It has been 6 years since I have decided to move off shared hosting like Dreamhost and Hostmonster. But never minded that Linode, the VPS suggested by many, would try to fool me like them.
So, what happened? Well, I have deployed a new profile in my ex-linode with Ubuntu Server 12 LTS 64-bits, reinstalled everything from scratch, and rebooted to start fresh. Is a nice feeling, you know? The expectation of a fresh LAMP barbeque after being cooking for a couple of hours. But unfortunately I got a cold pizza! It rebooted with a terrible kernel panic... so decided to contact support, willing to get good feedback. But this was the answer:
Linode says: "It seems that an OS update between then and now has caused this issue. At this point, I would suggest redeploying your Linode and copying over any files you need.
If you wish to continue to troubleshoot this issue, you may want to reach out to our active user community."
Man, I did that already, the old Ubuntu 10 profile was dead, why should I cook a new one if there lots of nicer things to do?... so I highlighted that, but the answer was hilarious: